Women and the Awkward Hug

All hugs are not the same. Sometimes, you’ll give a tight embrace. Sometimes, it’ll be lighter. You can give a hug for only a second. Or you can give a long hug with heartfelt meaning. But there’s one hug that’s just weird, and I have no idea why so many women use it. You know what I’m talking about, right? When a woman hugs a guy up top in a normal embrace, but she sticks her butt out at the waist.

Now, we all know why women resort to this kind of hug. But is it really necessary? Think about it for a moment and ask why women do this. There’s only one reason: women think a guy will have a reaction that will make for an awkward embrace. The possibility of this event will no doubt create relationship issues in the future, but how likely is that to happen?

I’ve never had an issue where, while hugging someone, I felt something that I shouldn’t. So it’s really annoying when women attempt to hug me and use this technique. This type of embrace is so prevalent in society right now, that I shouldn’t even give it a second-thought. But it’s always noticeable, and it basically tells a guy that females who hug this way think you’ll have an inappropriate reaction.

If so many women hug this way, it must mean that many of them have had issues with male friends or family members (yuck!) who may have had unexpected physical reactions. Is it that prevalent? Do guys often get excited when hugging female friends and family members?

Have you ever noticed this in public? A man stands straight and a woman stoops over. It looks completely ridiculous. It’s like there’s an invisible force field between them. And it’s kind of insulting. It basically states that you’ve placed judgment on this guy because you suspect he might get excited (in more ways than one) to see you.

Here’s my suggestion: if you think a man might have this reaction upon seeing you, don’t hug him! Oh, it’s rude not to? Hmmm. You’re going to insult him by hugging him or not hugging him. You can’t win here, but I’d rather avoid the entire situation, by not hugging someone, instead of giving this half-hug crap.

Let’s look at how guys hug. I hug my father like I’d hug my mother. But male friends give each other a man hug. Do you know why men created this type of hug? Because we saw women creating a new hug (yes, the one I’ve been railing against in this post) and think, “Damn, if they’re afraid guys are going to get an erection upon hugging them, what happens if a buddy does the same thing while hugging me? So men hug each other in a way that their private parts don’t have to touch.

Yes, ladies, I’m kidding. Men hug this way because it looks cool and feels manly. But women who stick their butts out look like they’re saying, “Ewww, gross: boy parts!” It’s ridiculous.

So what brought this up, you ask? I just finished a scene in the novel I’m writing and I wrote that a woman did this kind of hug, and I thought, “What’s that all about anyway?” And I can’t imagine there would be any other reason for a woman to hug this way. Unless, of course, you look at the picture of the women at the top of this post and think, “What’s that all about?”